Life Goes On

Life with William is, in a word, interesting. So is my state-of-mind.  To say that I am afraid or even intimidated by him is overstating it.  I am not fearful, but I am on edge.  Watching him buy Vera and walk her out of the ballroom on a leash, naked before hundreds of strangers changed my relationship with William.  That he was willing to pay well over two million dollars for a human being, well I just don't know where to begin.

For one thing, Vera is beautiful.  Not in a flashy way - you wouldn't expect to see her on the cover of a magazine or on a soap opera.  Vera looks like she was to the manner born.  She has the classic beauty you see in the wealthy neighborhoods, getting out of her Mercedes SUV with a toddler or two in tow but a perfect manicure and not one hair out of place.  She looks like the embodiment of elegance and understated style, even without a stitch of clothing on, which is how I always see her.  Seriously, aside from expensive heels and her collar, she is always naked.  I thought I had a pretty strong sense of myself and how I look, but Vera's perfect body is doing a number on my ego.

For another thing, sharing William's attention with Vera is wearing on me as well.  Don't get me wrong, he treats me like a queen and he treats her like a piece of meat, worse than a dog.  But even when she's not in the room, I know she's close at hand, ready to be called, eager to tend to her master's every need.  I never have to lift a finger.  I think that may be a big part of the problem.

I have to share the spotlight with Vera when guests come over as well.  I greet the couples who visit us as the lady of the house, as William's consort or even his wife.  I am elegantly dressed and I manage the servants so I can take charge of the evening and credit for its success.  But Vera is always the unstated center of attention.  William rarely makes mention of her, and he never addresses her directly in front of company, but she is always on display.  He waits until everyone has arrived before making his entrance, Vera just behind him and to his right, like a well-trained dog.  Most of our guests are mixed race couples as well and they are very discrete, but as much as they try not to stare, I see their furtive glances at every turn.

Finally, in the bedroom, Vera is rarely involved but never far from our presence or my thoughts.  Since the Black and White Ball, William has treated me as an equal, in life and in bed.  He kisses me tenderly, holds me in his arms as he would a wife, and is never disrespectful or overbearing.  He is a perfect gentleman and a generous lover.  And I hate it.

I miss being used and abused; I long to be beaten and whipped.  I want to be his whore again, shared with friends and acquaintances, rented out to strangers.  I don’t want to be his wife, or his mistress, or his girlfriend.  I want to be his slave.

I think that’s what he had in mind from the very beginning.  

Black and White Finale

Vera joined us at the table after the auction.  The attendant walked her down from the stage to William and handed him the leash. 

“Sit,” William said, his voice soft but firm.  Vera looked at the chair where she spent the first part of the evening.  She looked at the man who brought her to the ball, who sold her to William.  I watched the look of helplessness and shame overcome her, but she fought off the tears and kneeled at William’s feet, then slowly sat on the heels of her pumps.  She was still naked except for the shoes and the collar.

“Good girl.”  William smiled at her and stroked her hair.  She leaned toward him at his gesture and I knew she was about to break down.  Before the first sob escaped her throat, William grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled her head back and away from him.  His smile vanished.  Vera stifled her sob.  A few heads from the surrounding tables turned at the sound of Vera fighting to maintain control, but they only saw a man and his woman, leashed and obedient.  The auctions proceeded.

Vera was not the only woman William bid on that night, but she was the only woman he actually purchased.  As the evening ended and we made our way to the waiting limo, I didn’t know what to make of my position.  I walked out of the ballroom a woman transformed.  When we arrived, I was on William’s arm, his date for the evening, his plaything, to show off to other men like himself – a white woman with a black man.  Now I was the woman he didn’t own (I had no collar) in the company of a man with the woman he did own.  The woman he bought.  The beautiful, humiliated, naked woman he led to his limo by a dog leash.  What he had planned for her, what he had planned for me, I was left to wonder in silence.  I felt every pair of eyes in the ballroom on us as we exited ahead of the crowd. 

I remained silent as we approached the limo.  The driver opened the door for us and William led Vera as you would a greyhound to enter ahead of us.  William motioned the driver to hold the leash as he helped me into the limo.  Vera sat with her back to the driver’s seat, facing me as I took my seat and waited for William to join us.  The driver stood at the open door holding the leash as William circled behind the limo and entered from the other side.  Once he settled next to me the driver handed him the leash.  It was an obvious display that I was not to touch the leash, nor was it ever to be left unattended.

We rode in silence for several minutes.  Tears welled up in my eyes but I refused to let them fall down my cheeks.  Vera remained calm for the duration of the ride, her hands folded in her lap and her eyes cast down. 

“Vera, I understand you have children,” William said without looking at her as we arrived at the gate to William’s compound.

“I have two girls,” Vera said.

“Are they well cared for?”

“My husband takes care of them when I am away.”

“When was the last time you saw them?”

“Two weeks ago.”

“I will allow you to see them for a few days next week, but it will be months before you see them after that.  You have much to learn.”

A tear rolled down Vera’s cheek.  She had not looked William in the eyes since the auction.

“Now suck my cock.”

A Black and White Auction

After dinner and dancing, the stage was cleared and a small pedestal was placed under a spotlight as the house lights dimmed.  I had been dancing with William and didn’t realize what was happening, or who was missing from our table.  The room was quiet but you could hear whispers everywhere as the MC walked to the spotlight and raised the microphone to speak.

“Our first sale is going to start with a minimum bid of $1 million.”  He went on to describe the woman who was walked out from behind the curtain, naked except for her leather collar.  A leash was attached to the collar and in the hand of one of the attendants.  I didn’t hear anything else the MC said as I realized that the woman was from our table.  I glanced at the man who brought her, sitting and watching with no visible emotion.  I looked back at the stage just in time to see her step onto the pedestal.  The attendant stayed off to the side and slightly behind her, but the leash stayed attached to her collar as he raised his hand to allow some slack.  I was completely mesmerized by the sight of this gorgeous woman on display, ready to be auctioned to the highest bidder.  I have never been more excited.  I have never been more envious.

 “I’m surprised they started with such an attractive specimen,” William said to the table.  He nodded slightly to the woman’s owner, who returned the gesture without expression.  “Usually they start with someone a little less desirable, but Vera is magnificent.”

My heart fell.  William didn’t look at me.  I turned back to the stage, fighting tears.  The bidding was already at $2 million.  I tried to hide my disgrace by leaning toward William and whispering in his ear.  I was surprised at the amount of money that was about to change hands.  He ignored me and then he raised his hand and bid for her.

“Two million, five hundred thousand.”

At once I realized that this was the test William had warned me about.  I didn’t know if he was a serious bidder, but coming in as late as he did, and with such a jump in his offer over the previous bidder, I could only assume that he was very serious.  I was nearly delirious in my pain and humiliation.  I felt like everyone in the hall was staring at me, wondering why the man who brought me would bid such an outrageous amount of money for the first woman offered at auction.  What must everyone be thinking? 

I was about to find out.